Instead of Ladies & Gentlemen

 In the Queering Our Schools article, by the time I got to read what "they" commented after the horrible bus ride experience that could have ended Sasha's life statement that concluded " "I'm going to keep wearing a skirt. It's a big part of who I am." I honestly had to re-read the sentence to figure out who "they" are because it escaped me that Sasha refers to self in plural/third person.

I am respectful of others and don't care that there are all of these labels - LGBTQ+.  But, then again, I struggle to address by pronouns, and don't see why I can't address an audience as "ladies and gentlemen."

I remember the first time I had a student who wanted to identify as the other gender when I had known this child as the other sex for a year prior as my daughter's friend of a certain name. Now the name and gender was for me to learn as if I had just met this person. In a way, that's how I handled honoring this person's life change, Curiosity got the better of me and I had to learn all about this person, to make sure I didn't bruise the teen's mental fragility as well as deny the teen's self-identification requests. The teen took the role of the opposite gender (as it was in my mind)for my daughter's Quince, as elegant as if had possibly taken the court part of the opposite gender.

When I had a City Year assistant need a placement, I invited them to my class. They helped my class become better acquainted with the use of the plural pronoun, and what the terms non-binary, non-conforming and queer meant. I appreciated the lessons because I knew none of this vocabulary, and was ignorant of the vast sexual orientation spectrum.

A question to myself is am I as ignorant of my sexual orientation privileges as people who call themselves color-blind are about racism?

As an educator, I too want nothing more than to "create classrooms where each child, parent, and staff member...is appreciated and nurtured." And, only through education am I going to be able to help my school do that. I have read many works by some of the literary greats named in the article, not knowing (or caring) about their sexual orientation. Only in the past few years have I read literature about sexual orientation matters. My 15 y.o. daughter gave me the YA novel Love Simon, suggesting that it would help me to "get a clue." Then she prepared a list that I should read about teens expressing developmental frustrations regarding sexual orientation. 

As in the essay, I do believe that by "emphasizing empathy" we (educators) can talk about controversial and other sensitive issues with youth. "Community is built by working through differences" in any relationship and societies and schools are just networked relationships.  To empathize comes easily because, as pointed out in the text, we need to invite youth to voice their needs for social changes. Some of the examples given, "don't line bys separate from girls," "include books written by LGBTQ+ (about LGBTQ+)," refer to "parents instead of mother and father," and bring in guest speakers who are well educated on the topic, and or can share personal experiences about the topic. In doing so, schools can also bring their own staff to "come out," or have parents visit without hiding same-sex partners or their queerness to concur with the main idea that "A school that's a protective community for LGBTQ adults is a school that's going to be safe for [all] kids."

The article Being There for Nonbinary Youth Sometimes the "T" in LGBTQ  gets overlooked expresses what has seemed to be most difficult to have a conversation about, transgenedered people. I learned a lot of my ignorance in my own reflection of this piece. What does Eli mean that he's "cisgender?" And, Eli assuming one thing about another person because of the person's physical characteristics and demeanor, as Eli thinking that his "big red truck with a gun rack on it" driving principal would be least empathic about Eli's sexual status, would be something I'd think of a person described this way.

The most important point made by the piece is that there needs to be a reflection of oneself for one to know that the future holds a place for one to feel welcomed and understood.  "When kids like me grow up, ther's an adult version of me doing what everybody else does....there for me to see and know that there's a place for me to walk when I get older...Not letting kids see that can give them a subliminal sense that there is dead end to their identity..."  It's no different than a Black or Colored student wanting to read about his/her cultural experiences by people who share the same culture. "With every sex class we have that's not inclusive, and every English class where there's no inclusive literature, there's another trans kid that feels alone."

I will soon be watching the documentary It's Elementary to see about learning more about how to address the issue of inclusivity and the LGBTQ community in my school. 

 Mean time, his was helpful and it's something I'll play to invite students to talk about sex orientation.

I have a lot to learn about preferences of pronounce as much as of sexual orientation being half a century old, and not knowing of many bold people as I see and meet regularly today. However, I am open to learn, and I believe that People are People  so I make room for them at my office, classroom and as guests at my home. "Making this effort validates young people's core identity and solidifies their safety."